Russell Brand is divorcing Katy Perry after 14 months of marriage. I hear problems started when the couple couldn't agree on the color of the divorce announcements.
Sarah Palin says she wants two of the GOP candidates to quit. What she doesn't know is it isn't the number of candidates that's making her eyes cross.
Kim Kardashian earned $600,000 for showing up to a New Year's party. There goes my resolution to not start off the new year totally depressed.
A seven-year-old Indian girl was murdered in a tribal sacrifice and her liver offered to the gods to improve crop growth. And you thought your new year started off a little slow.
A Maine man has been found guilty of burning down a topless coffee shop. Which totally blows the resolution of every other man in Maine to have more topless coffee this year.
A body was found on Queen Elizabeth's estate. See what happens when you put your elbows on the royal table?
Steven Tyler is engaged. I'm going to go ahead and call that "Mission Impossible 5".
Dunkin' Donuts plans to double the number of its locations. All part of its New Year's resolution to make America even fatter.
Starbucks plans to raise some of its prices. The good news is applying for a latte loan has never been easier.
Michele Bachmann's out of the presidential race. Which should give her some extra time to run for student council.
The Catholic Church is asking Catholic gays to not have sex. Let them get married, and maybe that will happen.
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