I'm Thankful for Helicopter Hats

Family photos are the worst. You have to mill around in front of the stupid portrait studio while you wait for your appointment, which was an hour ago, while a bunch of crabby families and their crabby babies dressed up in cutesy holiday fare that makes them look like Santa's underage workers made a prison break and took a real wrong turn at JC Penney's shuffle about while they reconsider their stance on abortion. Then you have sit in a million fake-looking poses in front of fake-looking backgrounds with fake-looking props (styrofoam snowballs?) with your whole fake-looking family (did you really think that boob job would fly, mom?). THEN you have to PAY for it all.

Family photos are the worst. Unless this happens: