Not Your Usual Frozen Cow Conundrum

This is a cabin in Conundrum Hot Springs, Colorado. Inside of this cabin is an unknown number of frozen cows -- cows who wandered in, then couldn't get out, then froze to death. I don't know who gets put in charge of a problem like this, but whoever is in charge of this problem is considering using dynamite to solve it.

May I suggest:

and

and

You remember that old mathematical equation:

c + C (3) - e + * = : ( C (3)

Cabin plus three cows minus an exit plus snow equals three sad cows.

Let's turn that cow frown upside down.

FC (3) + (WG+c) / b = : ) h (35)

Three frozen cows plus one Weber grill plus charcoal divided by barbecue sauce equal at least 35 happy humans.